My Life as a Beggar

When I retired and moved near Bryn Mawr, I volunteered to help the college.  I figure that I got a good education at Bryn Mawr; it was time to give back.  So, I became one of the class collectors.  This being a “big year,“ (45th upcoming reunion), this task involved contacting former classmates and asking them to contribute towards our class gift.

At first, I was hesitant.  The phone calls were psychologically hard, and the conversation on my part was awkward.  I was not used to asking for money.  After all, we are Bryn Mawr women, independent and self-reliant.  Ask for money?  Ask for a handout?  Never!  That’s exactly what I felt like I was doing.  A classmate with a wonderfully wicked sense of humor called me one of the designated “class beggars.”  We laughed at that shared witticism, but really, when she said that, it broke the ice.  Yes, I am one of your designated class beggars.

A “Reunion Before a Reunion”

But I am learning.  In truth, I have come to enjoy these phone calls and to reconnect with classmates.  I have learned so much about the women who are my fellow classmates for whom I care deeply.  It is truly a reunion-before-a-reunion, a one-on-one conversation, and an excuse to reconnect with some fantastic women who comprise the BMC class of ‘74.

I have called about 15 women so far.  I hope to make more phone calls and to write more e-mails to reconnect with many of you prior to reunion.  I have learned to expect to spend some time talking to our fellow classmates should I reach you on the telephone.  When that happens, the years melt away.  It is not like asking for a donation for any other type of organization, because Bryn Mawr is so small that we usually know the person we are calling.  We have a shared value: supporting younger women in our feminist tradition, enabling them to become strong, decisive, and knowledgeable members of society.  I mention that tuition alone does not cover the cost of a Bryn Mawr education.

Fundraising Determines College Rankings!

I did not know until I volunteered to be a fundraiser that college rankings are partly based on the percentage of alumnae/i who donate to their school after graduation, no matter the amount of the donation.  I try to emphasize that in my contacts. (Some of the answers that I get are: “But that is so unfair!” Well, yes, it is, but that is the formula. I wish it were not so, but I do not have the power to change it.  So we just have to live with it [for now]).

Expect to spend time on these phone calls if you reach a classmate or a classmate returns your call. It is truly a mini-reunion. I have heard about the joys of grandparenthood, the sadness of losing a spouse. I have received and given solace.  I have heard what BMC alumns are doing around the country to raise funds for the college.  I hear about the activities of local Bryn Mawr alumnae clubs in cities around the country.  There are moments of shared humor, such as accepting the moniker of “class beggar.“  (“Well, if the shoe fits…”). I accept the challenge!  Thank you for sharing your impromptu news with me and for letting me into your lives.

It is a privilege to actually make these contacts.  It is a gift of time, both received and given.

Reconnecting Has Benefits

I still have some hesitancy, some awkwardness, but the benefits of reconnecting with all of you outweigh my uneasiness.  Why should we need an excuse to reconnect with classmates?  The conversations are easy, even after 45 years!  And, they are a joy.  Life seems so busy that we procrastinate, saying that we can call so-and-so tomorrow.  But tomorrow comes and goes and the phone call is not made, and in fact it is never made.  One of my classmates lived in the same city as I did 30 years ago.  She invited me for Thanksgiving dinner, and I had the best of intentions to reciprocate, but life got busy.  Then we both lived in another city at the same time, but again life got busy.  But at least there were phone calls! 

Thank you, Class of ‘74, for supporting us, your class collectors, in making these contacts.  Thank you for answering your phones or calling back.  But most of all, thank you for your financial support for Bryn Mawr.

Making these phone calls has been a blessing.  It has been an enriching experience to reconnect with all of you, my fellow classmates.  I am glad I did it, and I would recommend to all my classmates to make a few phone calls.  It is an enriching experience.  It is time well spent in supporting each other as well as in supporting the next generation of women.

Anassa kata!

Your classmate,

Gale Rutan

(BMC ’74)